Thursday, July 9, 2009

Blonde: To be or not to be dumb

I am an emcee this weekend for a wedding (which by the by, is WAY harder than being a bridesmaid!  I am already nervous, I have to pick out my own dress, and my job starts when the wine is served) and the bride gave me a book called 'The Wedding MC'.

In it, it says in order to have people like you and in order to poke fun at people in the wedding party, one must poke fun at oneself first.

So seeing as I spend much time criticizing others in this blog, perhaps it's time to shed light on some of my bigger dumb blonde follies:

1.  We had to take 'Theatre History' in University but it was stupidly scheduled at 10 am in our fourth and final year.  Okay, fine.  The normal world gets up for 9-5, but actors are not normal.  Especially those who are in shows in the evenings.  I was busy being Blanche DuBois every night until at least 11pm.  So not only was I not getting home until at least midnight, but I had to unwind from a three-hour performance which included a southern accent, bottle breaking, and being raped then going crazy.  Needless to say, I had trouble falling asleep.

So I often skipped the 10am theatre history class.

Luckily, my good friend T-dot was taking notes for me.  

I had all these notes regarding a famous playwright by the name of Goethe.  When I returned to class after the closing night, our teacher put a big 'GOETHE' on the blackboard.  But he kept talking about GERTA.  I was confused.  And not so subtly or quietly, I asked, in front of an ENTIRE classroom.  Who is Go - eh - the?  

The teacher was not impressed.  T-dot still goes on about it.

2.  I still have to make an 'L' shape with my hand when I am told to turn left.

3.  My friends and I just started a dog walking business.  I placed an ad on Craiglist. It reads:

Three lovely ladies will take care of your furry friend's needs.

Yup.  That's right.  Imagine our calls so far.

Do you like me more now that I have made fun of myself?

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